Parenting has become a big part of my identity and my anxiety since my kid was conceived 17 years ago. And when something is happening to me, I like to read about it. I read all the guidebooks and manuals and advice, but what I really like is an honest and funny book that tells the truth as the author sees it about life as a parent. These four books will make you laugh, maybe make your cry, and almost certainly cause you to hug the loved ones in your life a little closer.
Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son’s First Year by Anne LaMott (1993)
Anne LaMott is a fantastic memoirist, and this book is no exception. She depicts the first year as a mom to son Sam. She’s a single parent and a recovering addict, so she knows the importance of a supportive system, and we meet a cast of characters who help her get through the challenges of caring for an infant. Still, she feels worried that her child will miss out on a more standard nuclear family. Her descriptions of surviving Sam’s colic had me laughing, equating her sleepless madness to someone hiring Lady MacBeth as a nanny.
Mother Shock: Tales from the First Year and Beyond — Loving Every (Other) Minute of It by Andrea J. Buchanan (2003)
Buchanan equates parenthood with culture shock. She read all the pregnancy and parenting books but was not prepared for the actual experience of raising her child — just as reading a guidebook is not the same as taking a trip. Her essays about life with her first child made me feel grateful that someone else would admit that parenting wasn’t the rose-tinted experience everyone else seemed to talk about.
Waiting for Birdie: A Year of Frantic Tedium, Neurotic Angst, and the Wild Magic of Growing a Family by Catherine Newman (2005)
Newman’s memoir centers on her time pregnant with her second child and the challenges of parenting while pregnant. Oh my gosh, I laughed so much reading this book. Newman is brutally honest, which I love, spending equal time expressing what a pain pregnancy and parenting are and what a delight. I loved her stories about her three-year-old son’s quips. But most of all I loved the way she described the sweaty, mind-blank panic that she experienced when her baby cried. It was so familiar to me, but I’d never seen it depicted so clearly and honestly.
The New One: Painfully True Stories from a Reluctant Dad by Mike Birbiglia with poems by J. Hope Stein (2019)
Commedian Mike Birbiglia is very funny but kind of a mess with plenty of reasons why he shouldn’t pass along his DNA to the next generation. He’s a cancer survivor, he has a sleep disorder that can cause harm to him and others, and he’s not sure he likes kids all that much. This memoir shows his journey from anti-parent to reluctant parent to loving parent. The inclusion of poems by his wife lets us see both sides of this transformation from normal people into parents.